I don't feel like a princess.

Ok. So I claim to be a daughter of the king. What does that even mean? My heavenly father is up there watching and waiting for me to bring his beauty and grace to a world in desperate need. Then Howcomethat I don't feel like royalty?

I've always thought that once I was done having kids, I would "lose the weight" and then I would feel good about myself again. Is that what it takes?

Well, I've had the kids. I've lost the weight. Where's the feeling good about myself? A wise friend told me that the self-confidence part "comes from above". Now before you try to find the magic, pudgy little self-confidence fairy-gnome, she was talking about God. Now, the problem with this is that it's not as easy as one might think. You can pray for self-confidence all you want, but he doesn't work that way. This may seem like a bad thing, but it really isn't. In order fully appreciate what you have to offer the world, you have to see yourself through his eyes. This is where it gets tricky. God wants humility, but he loves us unconditionally and gave up everything in order to ensure he has a chance at a future with us. how does that work?!

In God's eyes, women are beauty. Not beautiful, BEAUTY. The real deal. We epitomize God's beauty. Women were created to show the world God's nurturing and beautiful side. Somewhere along the way, the world has projected it's own version of beauty on us. Sad really. We, who were created to BE BEAUTY, can't ever seem to live up to what we believe that to look like. The reality is, we are all there already. Tall, short, fat, thin, freckled, stretched out, or slightly tousled. We are BORN BEAUTY. Nothing we do will change that in God's eyes. How then do we explain this to a hurting world? By believing it ourselves! Easier said than done.

I want to encourage you princesses out there in your quest for beauty. However you present yourself to the world, you are showing them how you think God perceives you. When you are confident and self-assured in your beauty, you show the world the true beauty that God always intended for you. When you are concerned solely with looking "hot" in the world's eyes, you lose some of the true, real beauty you have been given. All the make-up and designer clothes in the world won't give you the same glow as a real, deep relationship with your creator. The one being in the universe that knows how to make you attractive to every person.

Now, before you start thinking I must have it all together, this is (and probably always will be) my biggest struggle. I have a God-given desire to be the most beautiful woman I can, but, though I know how to do this, I can't seem to get my ducks in a row. But I try. And I fail. I guess as long as I keep going, I haven't lost the race.